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Posts Tagged ‘wedding’

Today I spent the entire day looking at wedding venues, thinking about possible times to get married, and I told my mom and dad that it happened this weekend (He had asked for their blessing but didn’t have an exact time then.)

I’m not sure that it was a great thing to do considering I spent little time taking care of myself and am extremely hungry right now, but I do have some things figured out on my first day alone since the weekend getaway and the proposal.

– I want to say my vows in front of family and friends. Only the closest of these and even inviting my extended family is pushing it for me. This is super important to him to have them their, too.

-We want to have fun. He at least wants a dance floor and I would need a venue in my style… couldn’t stand fru fru for example.

-Without talking to him to confirm this, it seems the wedding would have to happen by June, in October, or June 2016. I see the benefits of waiting until June 2016 now where I did not before. We will be moving in together in the early summer and waiting another year will give us more time to adjust to that… or really more time to be ready for marriage. That would put us together for about 2.5 years before we get married if we waited till 2016. I see the good-god relieving benefits of getting married in June or October this year, too. But marriage isn’t a race. No rush. The less rush, the better and more assured, in fact. I just hate the waiting and don’t like having a ceremony to think about for that long. Perhaps I should have a paradigm shift about the whole thing. Attitude adjustment.

-There is a reason that the majority of weddings still have the same process to go through in the planning, etc.

-I think, let’s just be real, we both are feeling the gravity of the commitment we will be making. We have both been engaged before, myself married, and both have gotten cheated on. Though we are both over those scenarios, we don’t see the world the same way even if it is almost 100% for the better. We are feeling the wait of the commitment we made; we both seem a little serious this last two days. I pray that we only get stronger through this and love each other deeper.

-I will be stressed. I do have control over how stressed I will get, but I will experience some stress. I have to accept that in order to be less stressed. This is a major life event- both good and bad stress!

-I read in an article that a tip for a bride to be is to not let others’ less than enthusiastic responses to your marriage plans get to you. These are from unhappy people whether in their own marriages or those that wish they were married. I already got one today when I told her of my engagement, “Welcome to misery, jk.” And even just talking to my own mother who just acts like another daughter’s wedding is a chore. I won’t let these people bother me. I’ve been married before and have a very realistic view of marriage and don’t need any of their projections through theirs lens at all. bu bye negatorouses!

-I am going to marry a wonderful man who I respect greatly and am so proud of. I know how much he loves me. I’ll be learning about him through this new phase of our relationship as he will me when I am unaware. I will continue to treat him well. As he told me he was explaining to his best friend, “You know, I deserve the best. And I believe Julie is the best for me.” I will continue to be myself as I always have and know that is enough for this man I love.

I’m diving in, in my calm, peaceful way. Whatever he and I decide together, come what may.

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The timing was absolutely perfect! When I saw the ring before I registered that it was mine… I thought and said out loud, “That is so beautiful!” It was a perfect engagement full of meaning and so perfect in timing. I’m not the type to spill all the details out on here or post it on instagram or facebook. I’m on here to process this and record this enormous blessing and one that I’m full of gratitude about. He is a wonderful man and I knew this would be how our story would turn out.

I can tell you, that I don’t want a wedding. Do I want to say my vows in front of family and friends? Yes! I wouldn’t want it just the two of us. Do I want a lull in time before the wedding? No! I just want to have our lives back to normal. I don’t like any expectation of planning a huge event. I don’t like all the details, stress, and planning. What is important to me is the people I want there to be there, that he is happy, that my guests enjoy themselves (this includes a dance floor per his request), that I look awesome, and that there is something we can all share together in conjunction with the vows. Presumably, that would be good food at the least!

The things I can think about now on very little sleep are:

A private room in a restaurant to get married in and have the reception

A cruise (not sure about that)

Do you have any suggestions or ideas? Please leave me a comment! 🙂

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I’d like to think this is a good use of my time writing on my blog. Actually, I know it is because it is re-centering me right now.

Sister’s Wedding. 

Music for my Sister’s Wedding

Maid of Honor

Did I get the job??

He asked me to move in with him 

And I looked at that just now and noticed something… those are all GOOD GOOD things!

I am stressed though. Unfortunately. And I think now that I am processing it, it is because of my sister and my mother’s communication/behavior. My mom is being controlling and apparently wants me to stay with her the entire time. My sister is not communicating about me possibly staying with the the entire time instead (so I can avoid the control freakishness and have the most peace as possible leading up to the wedding.) Worse case scenario: both of those women are not an option to stay with because my sister doesn’t want me there and I can’t stay with a mother who has outbursts. What will I do then? Rent a hotel room and take a cab ride. Problem solved.

So let me look at that list again. Wow. Those are all awesome things!! I had an interview that went really well at a place I would LOVE to work, my wonderful boyfriend asked me to move in with him, and my sister’s wedding (and it’s almost done!)

I won’t let the bad outweigh the good anymore now that I am literally SEEING this for what it is!  🙂  This was absolutely worth every minute of my time because it has put things into perspective and now I am HAPPY!

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